Vacation Goals!

Today is my last day of work before my 9 day vacation starts! And yes, this last workday is a double (of course), so I'll be brief. I'm not going anywhere (staycation!) and with only a few things planned so far, that leaves me lots and lots of time for writing!

So I've set a few goals for myself, and hopefully I'll get most of them done...

Word Count. It's time to crack down on the first draft. At first I was thinking something ridiculous like 50k, then I thought maybe 30 would be more realistic. But since the first five chapters are around 14k, I brought it down to 20. But then I thought that wasn't good enough. So! The final word count goal for vacation is 25,000. There. That's it. Final decision.

Poems! I don't really plan on writing any new poems unless inspiration strikes, since forcing them never turns out very well. But I have been working on organizing what I have already and getting them polished for submissions. So I'm going to do some more research on different literary magazines and figuring out what poems would work where. No real concrete goal here, just going to try to get a lot done.

Blogs. Obviously I'll still be posting next week, but I also want to write a lot of blog posts that I can save--for all of those times when I don't have the time or energy to get one done. Well, I'll already have them. So the plan is to write 20 blog posts.

Reading. Mmm...books. Finally ordered some books from Amazon and I want to read all of them! First I'll need to finish the books I'm already reading, though. You can check out my progress on Goodreads if you'd like, just find the link on the right of my page. We can be friends, too! Making friends on the internet is so much easier than real life, isn't it?

Do I think I'll get all of this done? Probably not. The word count is the most important goal. I'll be checking next week with what I've accomplished so far. Wish me luck!

Bitch Stole My Plot!

It's that time again! The first Wednesday of every month is Insecure Writer's Support Group day. Check out Alex J. Cavanaugh's blog if you'd like to join!

I don't know if there's a word for a nightmare daydream, but have you ever had one where you're sitting in a movie theater watching the previews and suddenly you see a trailer for a movie that somehow is exactly like the book you're working on? No? Just me?

I think a lot of writers can be paranoid. It comes with the territory. If you have a great idea in your head, then you would be devastated if someone stole it. Especially for those of us who blog about their writing progress, there's always that little voice in the back of your head worrying about who is going to see your words and what they could do with them.

I was recently browsing books on Amazon and came across a novel that had a few similar elements to my WIP. And I proceeded to freak out. There's that moment where it feels like your whole life is over. You think all of your hard work has been for nothing because somebody has already done it. So what's the point in finishing?

You have to think of it this way: Everything's been done before. And yet, it hasn't. There are so many elements that go into a story that make it unique. Sure, there are only so many basic plot structures, and they've been used countless times. But you've got to factor in all of the details of a story--characters, plot twists, subplot. There's no way that you could accidentally write a story that's 100% been done before. Every element of a story makes it different. Like, if I changed my main character, if I swapped genders, changed to third person, or switched point of view. Each one of those changes would be an entirely different story. If I set it in the rural South instead of New York City. Different story. If my protagonist came from a nuclear family instead of a single parent household. Different story. Do you see how many things impact the story you're writing? And you come up with every single one of them.

As I read more about the book, I realized it really had barely anything in common with my WIP. Every story is unique and exists all on its own. In fact, after finally having some extra money, I bought the book and I'm looking forward to reading it. I love reading books in the genre I'm writing, because it helps inspire me. It's not that I look for ideas in these books, but that I wait for them to trigger ideas of my own.

And I know there's always the paranoia of theft. Sometimes we don't want to display any detail about our stories because we're afraid someone will steal it. But once again, it really comes down to all of those elements. Even if you gave just a basic summary and someone did steal it, what are the odds that they would end up writing the same story as you? They couldn't possibly guess every detail that you have planned. And chances are, if they are stealing, they probably aren't as good a writer as you and they won't be able to pull it off.

So write without fear! Your story is completely yours, and no one could write it quite like you.

Jordan Takes Over: Forcing Your Characters

**The first Monday of every month, I let my muse take over the blog. I apologize in advance...**

First of all, I've gotta slap some people around. Not a single one of you signed up for the Muse Mondays blog hop. Pfft. Whatever. We don't need you bitches. But in case you have no freaking clue what I'm talking about, click here! It's pretty flexible, I mean just pick any Monday you want. We'll probably get stricter if MORE PEOPLE JOIN.

Anyway, we've been having some issues. And as usual, I'm the one to blame. Sure, blame the muse when you can't write. Take the easy way out. Well, ok. Chapter 12 is such a bitch. Especially because it’s actually Chapter 11. But that’s beside the point!

Ok, let me lay out the scene for you. I go to this party and there’s some girls there. It’s really boring, but somehow I end up talking to this chick Madison, and she totally wants to jump me. Why? Because I’m gorgeous, duh. No, really, it may or may not be to get revenge on this girl who I had a thing with at some point in ancient history and who pissed Madison off for whatever reason. (You don’t find out because I didn’t. Yay first person!) And so we almost do it. Almost?! you're probably wondering—I’ll get to it…

Anyway, the almighty writer doesn’t understand why this chapter is so hard to write. But guess what? I do!

Here’s the problem: I DON’T LIKE GIRLS. Well, maybe sometimes. I guess that’s why it’s confusing. But still, it’s out of character because I swore off girls in the very first sentence of the book. So that brings me to a bigger question—are you forcing your characters? Are you making them do something that they wouldn’t normally do?

So if you try to force your characters—like into a girl’s…OH SHE WON’T LET ME WRITE IT. PG-13 SHE SAYS. Wait, does that mean I only get one f-bomb? When did this rule start?!

What was I saying?! Oh yeah, so if you think you’re in control of your story (is that what you think?), you might try to shove your characters into places where they don’t fit. I mean figuratively! Geez.

Like, ok! An example. Let’s say your character’s really shy, and they see somebody getting picked on, and they just randomly stand up to the bully. Does it seem realistic? Or are you forcing your character to do something they would never actually do just for the sake of the story?

Hold on—What? Stop whispering in my ear, woman! Ok, so if your character overcoming something is part of the plot—like they need to get over their shyness in order to grow, then that’s ok. You just need a reason for it. And the character needs to be aware of how out of character it is for them (whoa). And you need a lot of aftermath and contemplation and all that stuff.

So if you don’t have a good reason for it, then WHY THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IT?

I guess what I’m saying is let your characters be themselves. It’s gonna be obvious if they’re doing something weird. So if you need that moment in the story, you need a reason for it. The whole me and Madison thing is super complicated. But there’s a reason for it happening, and that leads to something happening after that’s even more important. I don’t wanna give anything away…*ahem.* Oh, who am I kidding? I didn’t get laid that night. By anyone. So lame.

But to make it a little clearer—I end up finding Madison attractive because she’s basically the girl version of me and I’m in love with myself (I could be a shrink, I swear). She had a vibe that was different from other girls. Plus I’m just a sucker for attention. So there’s your reasoning for why we start going at it. For a few reasons (that I’m not going to tell you, la la la la la la), it doesn’t happen. BUT. It does put me in a mindset to make a few impulsive decisions that lead to one thing and that leads to another and another and—you get it? The things that happen because of this out-of-character moment end up being HUGE for the overall story. So, there’s reasoning and there’s aftermath.

Those two things are essential if you’re forcing your characters to do something they wouldn’t normally do. Otherwise you’re just pushing them around. They’re not gonna seem like a real person if they’re just doing random shit all the time. You need some consistency, people! Don’t bully your characters. We can bite back. And I’m not gentle.

I guess that’s it. Well. Fuck. Good day!

JP 

The Birthday Goal

Sorry, no writing tips today. This one's all about me. I've had this idea floating in the back of my mind in order to crack down and get my first draft done. I'm not usually good with deadlines, since I'm quite the procrastinator. But lately my progress has completely plateaued. It's like all of my motivation disappeared. So I need to slap it awake.

I actually have three dates in my head for particular goals, but the first one is the most important: finishing the first draft. And my deadline is August 9. Why? Because it's my birthday! I don't know why I picked my birthday, really. I thought about giving myself the whole summer but that didn't seem like a strict enough goal. So it seemed like a good fit. Enough time to actually finish, but not too much so that I'll give up on the goal or take longer than necessary.

And the best part? I'm taking a vacation from work from July 6-14. There will be massive amounts of writing done in this time. I'm planning on getting the majority of the work done during that week, then using the following weeks to wrap it up.

Well, that's it really for today. My brain feels like a pile of mush. Hopefully I'll be making a birthday post about my fabulous first draft! But I'll be bothering you plenty of times until then...

It's Ok to Obsess

Obsess is defined as: (verb) to dominate or preoccupy the thoughts, feelings, or desires of (a person); beset, trouble, or haunt persistently or abnormally.

I've read a lot of things that say you shouldn't fall in love with your writing—that getting overly attached can only lead to heartache. It should come as no surprise that I completely disagree. And not just because I obsess over my own writing. Look at the definition again. Doesn't it describe the writing process perfectly? When you're working on a story, it certainly preoccupies your thoughts, probably your feelings and desires to an extent as well (you desire to write more than anything, right?). And I've certainly been haunted by a story idea before. So obsession is really just a natural occurrence when it comes to writing. And you should embrace it. 

I've been an obsessive person since I was at least 14 years old (probably before that, too, I just can't quite remember). I can't help it, really. Usually it's music, Broadway musicals, or (of course) my own writing. I think it's fun. Sure, there are several things that I like, but only a few things that I obsess over. It's a deeper level of liking something. You develop a personal relationship with that certain thing—you know everything about it. If you meet someone who likes it, too, it's like finding a soul mate. And usually, at least for me, obsessions never die. They may fade a bit, but they're always somewhere in the back of your mind waiting to be dug up and obsessed over again. 

So why should you obsess over your own writing? Well, it's not really that you should, it's that you're going to. If you're not, then your heart may not be in it. Of course, your level of obsession is up to you—there's mild obsession and insane obsession (I won't say which one I have...). You need to like what you're writing—if there's too much distance between you and your work, then the reader will probably notice. It could seem stale and void of emotion. If you want your characters to have passion, then you should have some passion for them. You want your reader to feel the same attachment to your characters that you felt when you wrote the story. 

More than anything, obsession will help you to just get your work done, because you never want to be away from it. So don't fight the obsession—embrace it! 

Over Thinking Your First Draft

Writing the first draft can be the best part of writing. It's when you're exploring the ideas and letting them run wild onto the page. At least, that's what should be happening. But occasionally you may start to worry as you're writing. What if a certain part doesn't work? What if the whole story doesn't work? If you let these thoughts creep into your mind before you even finish your first draft, it can really mess you up.

The whole purpose of the first draft is to just get it all out. Every possible thought that you could have for this story should be on the page. It might not all work, but it's too early to know that yet. Even if you've outlined the entire plot before you started writing, you're still not going to know if every single thing is going to work. You'll need to have some retrospect--get the whole story down and then look back to see how every part fits together. The second draft should be for going back, cutting things out, adding things in--really seeing how the story works as a whole.

This is definitely a case of "do as I say, not as I do." I was thinking about this subject because I couldn't quite figure out why my first draft was taking me so long. Yes, I have a sporadic work schedule and a life to fit in, but those can't be the only reasons. Sometimes when I sit down to write, it's hard to get the words down. I try to tell myself that it's ok for it to suck, just get it out, but I still can't do it. I realized it's because I've been over thinking the whole thing.

I think I have some sort of adapting-a-short-story-into-a-novel-itis, where this is the first draft of the novel, but not of the story itself. I'm trying too hard to fix things as I write them, and not after, like I should. I'm treating the novel too much like a second draft. So I'm constantly doubting myself along the way--trying to write the middle of the book and figure out the ending at the same time, thinking about all of the things I need to change in the first few chapters before I even finish. It's just too much.

It's important to take things one step at a time. If you think of things that need to be fixed, make a note of it then set it aside. You don't need to fix anything until you have a complete draft in your hands. Let yourself get caught up in the whirlwind of first draft writing. This part is the most fun, so enjoy it, and don't over think it.

The Almost Sex Scene

I’ve talked about writing sex scenes before and my issues with vulgarity, but today I’d like to focus on the sex scene’s annoying younger brother, the ALMOST sex scene. Have you ever read a book or watched a TV show and two characters are starting to go at it, and then somebody walks in, or they have a change of heart, or break an aquarium (New Girl, anyone??), and for whatever reason, they don’t have sex? Well this is the scene that I’m talking about, and in some ways, it can be trickier than the sex scene. You don’t want to throw this scene just anywhere in the plot, and there needs to be a reason for it.

I have written so many of these that it’s almost painful. But there always seems to be a reason for it. In my fantasy YA novel, both of my characters are in love with each other and just aren’t saying it, and in a moment of extreme vulnerability they start to get physical, only for one to realize that it would be wrong and they stop. I don’t think I had them stop just because it was a YA novel and I wanted to keep it tame—I think the moment brought the characters to a breaking point where they had to admit their feelings or they couldn’t move forward. With my current WIP, the reasoning is a lot easier—it’s illegal for my characters to have sex. But that doesn’t mean that the scene itself is just thrown in there. Yes, you need a reason for them to stop, but you also need a reason for the scene to exist in the first place.

So why would you want to include this sort of scene? Why have your characters start to get intimate and then get interrupted or decide not to?

I think the main goal in any scene like this is frustration—for the characters and the readers. It’s pretty obvious why your characters will be frustrated. You may be thinking that you never want to frustrate your readers—but in this case, a little bit is ok. Frustration can build suspense when it’s not overdone. If you tease the reader, then when the sex scene actually happens it will be more satisfying than if it had happened already. They will be on the edge of their seats waiting for it to finally happen. But it can be so easy to overdo it.

I used to watch soap operas. I know, I can hardly believe it either. But I bring this up because I remember a couple on one who kept almost doing the deed, over and over again, but it never actually happened. And the tension was fine at first—you know, the will they, won’t they? I would be very disappointed if these characters weren’t in an episode. But after a while it just got silly. The tension fizzled out. I didn’t care anymore. Then one of them died and the show was cancelled two episodes later (I’m not kidding). And they never did it! Forget about frustration, it just didn’t even seem realistic.

So I have a rule for the almost sex scene—you can only have one. That’s it. Just one. What’s that? You want two? Well, you can’t. Why? Because you want your readers to care.

I think one scene is all that your readers are going to put up with. That’s not to say you can’t have several scenes with sexual tension—that’s absolutely a must if you want your readers to believe that your characters are attracted to each other. But if they actually make a decision to get into bed and it doesn’t happen, the reader will be disappointed. A little disappointment is ok—if the book was perfect and happy then it wouldn’t be very interesting, would it? But if you offer the same exact disappointment twice, the reader won’t trust you anymore. They might skip ahead to find the juicy part, or, God forbid, stop reading altogether.

So if your characters are interrupted or change their minds, if they end up in this situation again, they’d better go through with it. You can only string along the reader for so long before the suspense becomes disappointment. 

How Do You Get in the Mood to Write?

When I was fifteen, I had a surefire way to cure writer's block. First I'd have to braid my hair. Not like one big braid or a french braid, but a bunch of tiny little ones all over my head so that I looked ridiculous and had a very hard time sleeping that night. BUT! The next day I would have perfect crinkly, wavy hair. Then I would dress completely in black and make pancakes. And sure enough, I would be able to write. It worked every single time.

Right now you're probably thinking that I was completely insane. Well, you're at least somewhat right, but there are reasons why my psychotic routine worked. I like to get into the mindset of my characters before I write. I feel I can write better if I'm connecting with them and understanding how they feel before I even begin. I like to get into their shoes, so to speak. Or actually, their hair. At the time, the main character in the book I was writing had long, wavy hair. All of my characters wore black (seems silly now, but that's how it was), and there was a scene where one character made pancakes. So everything I did to get in the mood to write had something to do with the characters. I like to think of it as appeasing the muse, so that he/she will feel generous enough to inspire you.

There's no right or wrong way to get in the mood to write. You just have to know what works for you. At one point I had a routine where I would drink coffee late at night and then do yoga before I started writing. Sort of a blend of staying awake but relaxing at the same time. For some reason I find I have more creative energy late at night. If I can stay awake, that is.

So what's my routine nowadays? I wouldn't say that I have one, exactly, but I do have a few little quirks. I like to listen to music before I start writing--it helps me to get ideas going and I figure it has something to do with the fact that my muse is a musician. I usually listen to something that helps me get into the mood for the specific thing I'm writing (like my playlist!). And if I have a day off to write, I'll wear something gray because I associate that color with Jordan--I'm sure thematically it has something to do with moral ambiguity, but really that's just what I always picture him wearing (Do you ever think about your characters wearing different outfits? They're like cartoon characters in my mind--always wearing the same thing.). I find it isn't some huge thing that gets me in the mood to write, but a bunch of silly, little things.

So how do you get in the mood to write? What do you do before you even try to get the words out?

Also, don't forget to check out my Muse Mondays page and join the blog hop!

Do You Need an Antagonist?

I’ve been overthinking things lately, and it’s sending me into a literary panic attack. I can’t figure out who or what the antagonist is in my WIP. I’ve been fluctuating between thoughts of “pssh, I don’t need no stinkin’ antagonist,” and “well, doesn’t every story have one?” Not to mention thoughts that there has to be one in there. But I can’t figure it out. Well, I’ve got my protagonist, of course—that much is clear. His love interest certainly doesn’t feel like an opposing force, at least once I get past the “we are absolutely not getting together” phase. His mom? Well, she’s not around enough and when she is, certainly doesn’t care enough to be disrupting things. Is my antagonist even a person? Is there something hiding beneath the surface that I’m not seeing? But wait! My protagonist is really an antihero at best—does that make him his own antagonist? Is that possible?

See the panic? But my crazy thoughts have got me thinking on a broader scale. Does every story have an antagonist? Do you always need one?

Some people automatically assume that an antagonist is a villain. While this certainly can be the case, it isn’t always true. A villain is usually obvious—some mustache twirling fiend bent on world domination. A bad guy. Usually the hero is trying to stop him. I’ve certainly written villains before—my fantasy stories always had one. But not every story needs a villain. And an antagonist isn’t always going to be one. An antagonist is defined as someone being opposed or struggling against an opponent. This doesn’t necessarily make them evil. Say you’re writing about a student running for class president, and they have an opponent. That person is an antagonist—they want the same thing the protagonist does and only one of them can get it. Now, if that other student resorts to sabotaging the campaign of the other in order to win, that makes them a villain.

So, ok, my story doesn’t have a villain. Not every story needs one. Well, what if your protagonist isn’t exactly a hero? Roles can be reversed. Sometimes the protagonist can be the villain, and the antagonist is the person trying to stop them. Who you’re rooting for depends on how the author spins it. Just because someone is the main character doesn’t mean they have to be perfect and morally upstanding. Take Macbeth, for example. Obviously Macbeth is the main character in the play, but he certainly isn’t perfect. He commits murder to become king, and continues to have people killed in order to stay in power. Sometimes having a good guy be the main character isn’t always the way to go. What if the student in our election story is a good person, but decides that she can’t win and has to destroy the reputation of her opponent? It can be more interesting to watch a hero descend into wrongdoing than just despair at something bad happening to them.

So yes, I think my protagonist is an antihero. He purposely corrupts someone else in order to gain things for himself. But I still don’t know who my antagonist is. I guess I’ve created a situation where both main characters can be seen as a victim depending on how you look at it. But there’s no opposing force that’s clear to me. I’ve read things about how your antagonist doesn’t even need to be a person. Is society my antagonist? Well, maybe a bit. I’d feel stronger about this if my characters were desperately in love and the legality related to their age difference was the only thing keeping them apart. But that’s not the story I’m writing. So then is my protagonist battling himself? Is there an aspect of himself that is actually the antagonist? Well, that doesn’t seem to fit, either. He’s not struggling with his sexuality, and he doesn’t feel guilty about manipulating other people. He’s only concerned with getting what he wants.

Have I totally screwed things up by not having an antagonist? Or is there one there that I’m just not seeing? I feel like every character has a little evil in them, but that doesn’t necessarily make them a villain. It just makes them human. I’ll probably be pondering my antagonist (or lack thereof) until I figure it out, or decide I don’t need one.

The Greatest/Worst Book Ever Written

It's a busy blog hopping week for me! Aside from starting my own, I've joined one as well: the Insecure Writer's Support Group. It seemed like the perfect fit for me, you know, since I'm just chock full of insecurity. Visit Alex J. Cavanaugh's blog if you'd like to join, too! 

So what I'd like to talk about are the ups and downs of writing a novel. The feeling you have one day that this is the best idea anyone's ever come up with in the history of forever, and then the feeling you have the next day that you've written absolute crap that will never amount to anything. Which thought process is right? How do you deal with this roller coaster of insecurity?

I have this problem all of the time. When I first wrote my WIP as a short story, I thought it was the greatest thing I'd ever written. I gave it out to friends, handed it in for a college workshop. I thought I was brilliant. Now I can't even stand to read a sentence of it. The fact that so many other people have read it still bothers me. The novel version has the same characters and same basic plot--but still, it feels light years away from the original. But how can something be perfect one day and then horrible the next?

I think it has a lot to do with creative energy. When you're first getting your ideas down, it's exciting; it's like a purge of all of the ideas in your head. There's nothing quite like it. You'll come up with a sentence in your head and think, "Oh, that's brilliant!" and getting it down onto paper or the computer and actually seeing it before your eyes is thrilling. But once that sentence sits around for a while, you might not find it so brilliant anymore. You might see several ways to rewrite it, or you may want to scrap it altogether.

But when are you right? When you started and thought you were a genius? Or when you look back and see how horrible it is?

If you only listen to your pessimistic side, then you'd probably want to give up every other day and not bother writing at all because you're so horrible at it. If you only listen to the optimistic side, though, once you start trying to get published, you may become overly frustrated because you can't understand how these agents or publishers just aren't getting your genius! See the problem? Neither side is right, but neither is wrong. You need both to balance each other out. You need to have confidence in yourself and your writing. But you also need some self-doubt in there, too. How will you ever be able to edit if you can't see any flaws in your work? You need part of yourself to tell you that something isn't working, but you also need that part to tell you when you get it right.

The way I like to think about it (especially as I'm only writing my first draft), is that I know that something isn't right, but I just don't know how to fix it yet. Make a note of all the things you want to fix, but don't get too frustrated or give up just because it seems like a lot of work. And give yourself some credit. Highlight those sentences that really do work and try to see why they are so perfect. It just might help you figure out the rest.

Jordan Takes Over: See What I Did There?

I’m back, bitches! Every first Monday of the month, I get to take over. And today, I’m going to tell you why I’m awesome.

But let’s get business out of the way first. Look up! See something new? That’s the Muse Mondays page, where you can sign up and join all the festivities. Why would you want to join? Because I said so!

All right, now that’s over, back to the real reason why you’re here: me! I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Geez. Well, sort of. I’m actually gonna talk about why your muse is perfect and why you should always listen to him/her.

We’re fickle creatures, really. I mean, I certainly don’t stay put for very long. I’ve got quite the short attention span. But that doesn’t mean I’m not ever helpful. I just have a lot of shit to do, you know? I’m distracted by shiny objects. And cute boys. And snacks. But whatever. I’m a creative person. I get it. There are days where you sit around hoping that inspiration strikes, and then there are days where you say to yourself, “fuck it, if I want to write, then I’m gonna write!” Easier said than done, right? It’s those times that you force yourself that it feels off—the fact that you weren’t really feeling it shows up in your writing. It’s because you need your inspiration—you need your muse. And sometimes we’re just not around.

Anyway, I said something about your muse being perfect, right? Right. Well, that’s because they are. Perfect for you. And, please, do not get it into your head that you created us or chose us or whatever bullshit reason you have come up with. We exist just fine on our own, and we chose you. Sometimes you’ve got a good story, but you can’t tell it on your own. You need somebody to help. That’s where you come in. It’s the perfect relationship, don’t you think? We need a person with fingers to type and words in their head and you need somebody to inspire you and give you ideas.

But I guess the main thing I’m trying to say here is that you need to trust your muse. Even if it doesn’t make sense. If you get struck with an idea and you don’t think it’s going to work, try it anyway. Trust me, there’s a reason for it. What’s the worst that could happen? If you finish it and you know it doesn’t work, so you lose a few minutes. You probably would have spent more time wondering about it if you didn’t write it. Things don’t always work out. I mean, we’ve written some horrible shit that seemed perfect at the time. But, you know, things change. If you let ideas build up inside your head then, well, you’re just gonna explode. And nobody wants that (I mean, brain explosions. Others are just fine *wink wink*).  

How many times have you written something that seemed insignificant but then you looked back and saw just how perfect it was? Or you somehow worked some genius symbolism that you didn’t even notice? Yeah, well, you’re welcome. You know when they say, trust your gut? Well, in writing that just means trust your muse. Because we know what the fuck we’re doing, all right?

All right, I’m done rambling. I’ll see all you losers in a month.

JP

The Muse Mondays Initiative

After my post last Monday, I realized that Muse Mondays is pretty much the only thing I've been at least somewhat consistent with. I suppose because on some level the muse is my gimmick, my shtick. But then at some point that day it hit me that I want to get more people involved. I don't just want it to be my weekly rant. I want it to be a thing.

How I do this? A blog hop, of course! So I want to recruit you!

Every week I'm going to write a post for Muse Mondays. And you can, too. I think the idea of a muse goes beyond the imaginary friend that helps you write. It’s about inspiration and ideas, too. Where do you find your ideas? What books do you read or music do you listen to that get your creative ideas going?

But since it is also about the imaginary friend who helps you write, I’m going to let mine take over on the first Monday of every month. Starting next week. Scary, right? We haven’t discussed what he’s going to talk about yet. This could be either brilliant or disastrous. But I guess that’s why it’s fun.  

Don’t feel obligated to do the same things I do, or to even write every week. Since it’s all about inspiration, do what inspires you. You can introduce your muse or your characters, or someone in your life who inspires you. 

I’ll have a separate page up soon on the blog with all the details and a place for you to sign up. I’ll probably create a badge for it, too, once I figure out how to do that sort of thing. Since this will probably take forever to get going, if you’re one of the first people to try it with me, I will give you heaps of praise and adoration--meaning links and retweets and such and such. 

So come back next Monday to sign up and see what psycho babble Jordan has to say. And join me in the madness...

The Faux Fountain Pen Turns Two!

Yikes! It's hard to believe that it's been a whole two years since I took my first steps into the wonderful world of blogging. I could get all reflective and sentimental, but I'll spare you. I've certainly made some progress and am only hoping to make more in the following months.

Thanks to all of my followers, the ones who have been there from the beginning and the ones who have only recently stumbled onto my madness. For funzies, check out my very first blog post to see how it all began. And stop back tomorrow if you'd like to be recruited for something awesome...

Yes, I still have the pen. And it still works!

Ideas are Everywhere

Have you ever people watched? Maybe you noticed someone interesting or overheard a conversation on the subway or in a store or restaurant. Most times you'll forget about these people as soon as they're out of your sight. But every once in a while, you may find yourself wondering who these people are and what their lives are like.

It's the "what ifs" that usually lead writers to create their ideas. That person on the subway could become your next character. We find our ideas in all sorts of places. Once you have just that spark of an idea, then you can shape it into a story and make it your own. But what's the best place to find ideas? Do they come more from observations or from the depths of our brains?

There's no right or wrong answer to where you should get your ideas. You should get them wherever you can find them. Sometimes they might pop up out of nowhere, as if they were a vine growing out of your brain. More often, though, they will come from something--an observation, a question, a character whose story you have to tell. Chances are that you won't need to go searching for ideas. They'll find you instead.

One of the most interesting places to find ideas actually happens while you're sleeping. That's right, dreams. Sure, some dreams are going to be complete nonsense, but every once in a while there could be an idea that strikes you. I mean, there's at least one best-selling author who this has happened to (cough sparkly vampires cough). I had a dream once that my boyfriend and I were performing in a play, but the play itself seemed interesting enough that I actually wrote it. I've even had dreams that have led to plot twists in something I'm already writing. And I'm working on a short story that stemmed from a dream. So the possibilities are endless. Don't dismiss an idea just because it seems crazy; your subconscious might be on to something.

Perhaps my favorite and yet most shameful treasure trove of ideas comes from watching bad daytime television. I mean, it's just chock full of perversion. I got an idea for a play from watching an episode of Dr. Phil. Sometimes you just watch these crazy people spilling all of their horrible secrets and problems and your brain just keeps going with it. I often forget that the initial idea for my WIP came from watching an investigatory special on E! and thinking, what if I created characters in that situation?

Ideas can come from anywhere. It's what you do with them that ultimately matters. By the time you've crafted your story, that initial idea may seem even strange and foreign. Things change as you write, because you're going to know what is needed the more involved you get with it. But all stories start with an idea, even if it's a tiny, almost insignificant thought. So if you find yourself asking "what if," you just might have struck gold.

Visualize Your Characters, Part Three

This is the last part, I swear. So far I’ve talked about how you picture your characters, and how you introduce them to the reader. Now I want to just tie up some loose ends.

Including a vast, detailed description of a character on the first page of your book can seem awkward and out of place. Like I said last time, you need to find the right spot to include this information, and it will vary depending on your story. There’s a good spot in there; you just have to find it. But that doesn’t mean that you have to dump all that information on the reader all at once. You can stretch it out over the course of your novel, at least while we’re still getting to know your characters.

Give a description that helps us picture your characters right, but hold off on details that aren’t necessarily needed. If you need to include them for whatever reason, there may be a different spot for them. We may want to know how tall a character is or what hair color he has right when we meet him, but we don’t need know about the way he slouches or his nervous laugh. These are details that you can include at the right moment in your story. Maybe he has an embarrassing moment and that’s when a certain trait comes out. If you include too much information in the initial description, especially for traits that aren’t immediately noticeable, it might seem like unnecessary backstory.

While it’s important for your readers to be able to picture your characters, what they look like isn’t nearly as important as what they’re doing. You want to keep your action descriptions vivid, without bogging it down with unnecessary sighs and moans. Make your characters believable—give them individual traits or quirks that you can use every now and again. Make sure your characters have distinct voices, as every person has their own way of talking. Even a catch phrase can be acceptable, as long as you don’t overdo it (Jordan’s is “oh, for fuck’s sake,” and I actually use it in real life now, like a lot. More than he does. So I guess it's my catchphrase).

The bottom line here is that you want your characters to come off as real people. They need to look, talk, and act like a real person would. Of course, they’re still individuals and you can manipulate their personalities in whichever way you need that makes your story work. But make sure to describe them so that your reader believes this is a real person. If your character is beautiful and smart and nice and just perfect, then your reader will lose interest. This isn’t a real person. Real people have flaws. Your character doesn’t necessarily need to be aware of it (narcissism is a good flaw), but your reader does, and so do you.

So make your characters vivid and realistic. But ultimately, make them yours. 

Hey, So...I Lied...

Ok, maybe not lied, exactly. More like jumped the gun. Which I tend to do. But hear me out. I worked eleven straight hours yesterday, no breaks, no food. Just brief drinks of water while walking very fast. I didn't even make it home in time to call my mom before she went to bed. So today I still had to run around to find a Mother's Day present (I'm a procrastinator. You should know this by now.) and then drive for forty-five minutes and spend the whole day with my mom and sister. So now, I get home and I'm all set to start writing my blog (except my boyfriend got himself a coffee and not one for me), and suddenly it's the only time that we have to go see Iron Man 3. Well then. Off we go.

So come back on Wednesday for Part Three to my Visualize Your Characters series. I'll probably have better ideas by then anyway.

Visualize Your Characters, Part Two

We all know how important it is to give a proper description for your characters. If you don’t, your reader will have a hard time picturing what is happening to them, or they might create their own idea of what your characters look like (and you wouldn’t want that, now would you?). The real problem isn’t why you want to give a decent physical description, it’s when and how. You want the descriptions to fit in flawlessly with the rest of your prose. You want to introduce your characters in a way that fits in with your narrative.

To demonstrate what I feel is necessary in order to describe your characters properly, I’m going to use my three main characters as examples. Bear in mind that this is the roughest of rough drafts, but while the writing certainly isn’t flawless, I think the main points are there. So I’ll be able to describe when a character is describing himself, someone he's just met, and someone he's known all his lives. You’ll want to approach each character in a different way—what do we need to know about their appearance to get a good picture of them? If you’re writing in first person (which I do), how are these traits noticeable or important to your narrator?

One of the hardest things to do is to have a first person narrator describe him or herself. If you think about it, the narrator is basically talking to the reader, and if you were talking to somebody, would you start describing yourself? No, because that person would be looking right at you. So the narrator/reader relationship is slightly different. This is why it gets tricky. You want your narrator to be clear, but you don’t want the description to seem forced. And for the love of God, don’t have them stand in front of a mirror describing themselves. Don’t just work with your character; work with the story. Find a spot in your narrative where it works and doesn’t seem random. I snuck in Jordan’s description while he and his friends are talking about girls. He starts thinking about why girls find him attractive, which he finds hilarious because no one knows that he’s actually gay.

I don’t really know why I was hot. I guess you’ve got some girls that like muscular guys, you know, with lickable abs. But then some girls go for skinny guys. They all like tall guys, of course, and I wasn’t a giant or anything but I had my growth spurt at thirteen. And I didn’t really think the girls were going crazy over my brown eyes, or short, light brown hair…I guess it had to be my face. I’ve got high cheekbones and a smile that can kill. Plus a complexion that girls would be jealous of—I’ve probably had about three zits in my entire life. So I wasn’t drooling over myself in the mirror or anything, but I understood.

It’s probably the easiest for a first person narrator to point out their best features. He sort of glazes over most of his description, comparing himself to other guys, but then points out what he thinks actually makes him attractive. Like I said in my first post, it’s all about the character. Jordan is cocky, so he’s going to emphasize his good traits, and not even downplay his mediocre ones. But if your narrator is an insecure teenage girl, she might talk about how she hates her nose or can never get her hair right.

While having the narrator describe himself might be difficult, the easiest part is probably when he meets someone new. You get to see this character along with the narrator for the first time. Think about when you meet someone, like a classmate or a new coworker. You’ll notice their most striking features right away—red hair, bright blue eyes, an unusual way of dressing. But you’ll also be taking in their whole appearance, trying to memorize what they look like while remembering their name. When describing a new character, you’ll also want your narrator to respond internally. If they’re repulsed by the way the person smells or their crooked teeth, then they’ll be thinking mostly about that. If they find this person attractive, they’ll be thinking about that while trying to act calm and collected. And they’ll probably be taking in more detail. When Jordan first meets his math tutor, Tom, he immediately takes in every detail of his appearance because he is struck by it:

That smile nearly knocked me on my ass. He was definitely older, maybe around thirty. I couldn’t be sure. Just a bit taller than me, and skinny but not a twig. He had dark hair, almost black—a bit long but brushed out of his face, falling back in delicate waves down to his ears. And these blue eyes—I mean, I could have just died right there.

The thing I like about this is that Jordan tends to see people in comparison to himself—older, taller, etc. Always keep your character’s attitude in mind. Your reader doesn’t necessarily have to agree with your narrator’s perception, but they have to believe it. If he’s attracted to the person he meets, make it striking. Make him notice everything about this person and understand why he feels this way.

When it comes to somebody your narrator already knows, it’s a tricky balance. Like himself, he already knows what this person looks like. You probably want these descriptions to be brief—let the reader know what this person looks like but don’t make it a page long, glorifying every detail (unless say, your narrator is secretly in love with his best friend whom he’s known for years). While this person isn’t going to stand out to your narrator, he will notice things that are different or impressive—like a new haircut or a nice outfit. When Jordan describes his mother, he once again relates her to his own appearance, but mostly notices how she dresses, because it’s part of who she is:

Mom looked a lot like me—you know, a tiny stick of a thing—but with boobs. Since she was always working, she was always in some tight little dress or skirt with her hair pulled back. Today was no different. She threw her purse on the counter and started rummaging through it. When I stood next to her she stopped and looked up at me, crinkling her eyebrows. “When did you get taller than me?”

You can add in little details that work within the scene so that they are noticed but don’t stand out like a sore thumb. I could have had Jordan say that he was taller than his mother, but worked it into the scene instead. Rather than a passing thought, it asks questions about their relationship, like, why is she just noticing this now? How often do they see each other? There are a million little ways you can work in these sorts of details. Just look at your story and figure out where they fit in.

About halfway through this I decided there needs to be a Part Three. So come back on Monday for more about keeping descriptions fresh and maintaining them throughout your book. And probably some other things. :) 

Visualize Your Characters, Part One

Have you ever played the Sims? If you’re also a writer, I’d be willing to bet money that you’ve played it as one of your characters. It’s a fun little indulgence. But isn’t the best part crafting your character before you even start the game? You get to pick every tiny detail, down to the shape of their nose and what they wear for pajamas. While it may not be perfect, (I couldn’t get Jordan’s hair quite right. And what do you mean a teenager can’t be in a relationship with an adult? Sheesh.) it’s pretty damn close. Then your character gets to frolic around town wreaking havoc (or just fishing a lot). It can be a lot of fun.

When you’re picturing what your characters look like, how do you decide? Do you plan out every tiny detail of their appearance, or does it just come to you? You want your readers to be able to visualize your characters. So the first step is that you have to be able to visualize them.

I’m having a difficult time truly picturing one of the characters for my side project. Other than the fact that he has green eyes and is just a little chubby, I can’t really picture him. His face isn’t clear, his hair, how he dresses. Nothing. And while this sort of predicament can be frustrating, it isn’t the end of the world. I truly believe in letting the characters speak for themselves, rather than forcing them to be what you want them to be. Sure, you could come up with a quick description, and if you don’t like it, you can always change it. But if your character is constantly changing, does he feel real to you? Or does he feel contrived?

Every character is different. You may be able to see them perfectly in your mind before you get the first word down, or you may have to start your story with your characters being blurry ghosts that haven’t fully developed yet. It took a very long time before Jordan was clear to me, probably over a month after I had finished the initial short story. His love interest, on the other hand, was clear to me in the very first scene I wrote him in. I really have no idea why. Maybe because it’s easier for a narrator to describe someone else rather than himself (more on this in my next post!). Maybe my characters are just finicky.

But how do you decide on what your characters look like? You want them to look like real people. You want there to be differences between them, like not having all of them have brown hair (Whoops. I may have done that. But there are like a million shades of brown…). And unless you’re writing romance, you probably don’t want to have your hero be a tall, muscular god who can easily lift the petite, long, flowing-haired beauty into his arms. Appearances have to work for the story as well as the characters. If your character is awkward, maybe he can have an awkward appearance. If he's confident and self-centered, he's probably good-looking. 

You can have fun with it, too. I’m a full supporter of geeking out when it comes to people who look like your characters. I once saw a boy on the subway that looked just like Jordan and had to seriously restrain myself from taking a picture of him. And I know there are plenty of authors who come up with dream casting for their books, which I feel can be a good and bad thing. But if a book is made into a movie, isn’t it hard to read the book without picturing the characters as the actors? I don’t think this is a bad thing. It really helps make the characters, and thus the entire book, more concrete as you read. If it helps you to see your characters better, then go for it. Just try not to get too attached, or realize that one of your characters looks like an actor you already like and become even more obsessed (not that I’ve done that or anything). But still, it’s a fun thing to do, like playlists or playing the Sims.

Come back on Friday for Part Two, where I’ll attempt to explain how to describe your characters.

Read What You Write

If you ask advice about how to better yourself as a writer, most likely anyone will tell you that you have to read. You’d be hard pressed to find a writer who didn’t love to read. That’s probably what started us all on this crazy path they call being a writer. A love of words, and so, a love of books. So, of course you should read. But what?

I went through a phase (when I worked at a book store and got a decent discount) where I bought dozens of writing reference books. The how-to’s of dialogue, first pages, characters, plot, etc., etc. They accumulated in piles on my bedroom floor once the bookcase was full. And while I never read one in its entirety, I would pick them at random (or if I was having a specific issue) and skim through, searching for answers. And if I’m being honest, I didn’t find any. Sometimes advice is good, but those sorts of books aren’t going to tell you how to write your book. Only you can do that.

But that’s not to say you can’t seek out some kind of influence. When I used to write ridiculous, Gothic fantasies, my favorite writer hands down was Anne Rice. I adored The Vampire Chronicles. But it’s sort of like the chicken and the egg. Which came first? Did I write vampire stories because I loved to read them, or did I read them because I already wanted to write them?

Nowadays I struggle to name a favorite author, even a favorite book. I’ll occasionally jump on the bandwagon and read something that everyone else is reading, like The Hunger Games or the Millennium trilogy. I sometimes try to read poetry or short stories, but I crave novels more than anything. I don’t read nearly as much as I should, mostly because I’d rather be writing in my limited spare time.

But it should come as no surprise, really, that in the past couple of years I’ve been reading a lot of gay fiction. Obviously this time the writing came first. But I do find it interesting that I still crave to read the same genre as whatever it is I’m writing. I think it’s more than just being aware of how your genre works. It’s almost like wanting to be around people with whom you have things in common. If you like to write a certain genre, chances are you like to read it as well.

Of course, there’s the possibility for overkill. You want to absorb the influence of the books you read, but in the end, your work should stand on its own. There’s a chance you may get discouraged, if you start thinking that every idea has been done before. But you still have a story to tell. The most important thing I take away from reading is the drive to write. Sometimes I can’t get through a page without my thoughts drifting off into my own story. And that’s perfectly fine. That book will still be there when I close my laptop. 

Unleash the Ideas

Occasionally Jordan bothers me with tales of his various sexual escapades. It’s not really a problem, because it helps me to understand and develop his character more, even if these events occur in the future beyond the scope of my novel. But the funny thing is that I rarely write them down. They’re usually just silly little fantasies.

Here’s the problem: if I don’t write something down, and think about it enough that I can really visualize it, then it never stops bothering me. No matter how much time goes by, they always come back to haunt me. But if I do write them down, then I stop thinking about them.

So I’ve put the book aside for a quick recess to write a cute little short story. There’s no purpose to it, really. It’s just about one of Jordan’s relationships about a year after the book takes place. And I’m writing half of it from his point of view, and half from his love interest’s (multiple POVs? What is this madness?!). Why am I doing this? Really, it’s just for fun.

I’m all for giving in to indulgences when it comes to writing. I have pages and pages of ideas that will probably never be used for anything, but the joy I got from writing them down makes it worth it. Usually writing these sorts of things reinvigorates my drive to write in general. Plus, if I’m distracted by some random idea, how can I get back to my actual work until that idea is out of my head?

It took me a couple months to finally make the decision to write this story down. I just couldn’t ignore it any longer. But I almost simultaneously made a decision to write down an idea I’ve had in my head for years. It’s completely insane, but I’m going to commit to it. Let me start by saying I love, love, love musicals. I would love to write one, but I don’t have a drop of musical talent in my body. And for some crazy reason, sometimes I concoct an idea for a musical based around a CD that I own. Usually it’s just a fleeting idea, but I’ve had a concept for Fall Out Boy’s Folie À Deux for a few years now (Yes, I like Fall Out Boy. Leave me alone.), and every time I listen to a song from that album, I see the ideas playing out in my head. So I figured, why not? If nothing else, I can get the ideas out of my head, and get some practice in script writing while I’m at it. It’s nuts, I know, but I just feel like it’s something I have to do. These ideas will just nag and nag at me until I do something about it.

If you let the ideas build up in your head, then it just might drive you crazy. Not everything has to be a masterpiece. It doesn’t even have to be shared with anyone else. It can be completely for you. You’re going to get something out of it, even if it’s something small. 

The Most Anti-Climactic Drum-roll, Please!

Well, I thought I'd share some news with my readers. I just found out that I did not advance to the final round of the contest I had entered. I'm not thrilled, of course, but I'm not devastated, either. I spent the past two months fretting over all the things that I thought were wrong with my manuscript, so much so that I was probably over-thinking it. So I guess I'm just glad to be out of the insecurity limbo.

Plus, this was the first thing I ever tried to do with my novel, and it's not even finished yet. Of course I was going to fail! It's the harsh reality of the publishing world. But it's certainly no reason to get discouraged. I just have to keep writing until I can't find anything to nitpick anymore. Then maybe there won't be any more insecurity, only optimism.