05 December 2018

Motivation and Writing Space Stuff

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Here we are! The last IWSG post of the year! HOLY CRAP WHERE DID THE TIME GO??? *ahem* So it's time to scramble to wrap up any goals before they get repackaged as New Year's resolutions. Again. I'm about 99% sure that I've given up on my reading goal, well, because I've pretty much stopped reading. That was a tough one since I've never made it so close (67/100), but it just doesn't seem possible to finish in less than a month. I thought if I spent all my time reading, then I definitely wouldn't finish the third draft of my novel, which may or may not happen before the year is over. 

I think my main problem with writing is MOTIVATION! Sometimes even when I want to write, even when I have ideas, even if the scene seems easy, I just can't make myself start working. Ok, part of the problem may be that I'm always tired, and sitting around watching TV just sounds a lot better, but even when I make plans to write (especially on a day off), I still don't get a lot done. It's like there's something holding me back. Is it the fear of finishing? I'm not sure. If it is, it's probably subconscious. It could just be laziness and procrastination. It could be a mixture of all these things! But I do want to finish this damn book, so I'd better make with the motivation pretty soon.

This month, I thought I'd answer the IWSG's optional question, which was: What are five objects we'd find in your writing space?

Ok, so I'm cheating a little on this one. I'm gonna reuse an Instagram post from earlier this year, and it's more than five objects, but they are things that are usually useful/necessary for writing. I have a very very very small apartment, so I don't actually have a writing space (like an office or even a desk). I just write on my bed. So here are the things that usually find their way onto the bed during writing time: 


1. Laptop (for the writing of the words), and headphones (inspiration music is entirely necessary and not at all distracting)
2. Notebook & pens for brainstorms/free writes/whatever, my red 3rd draft binder, research books (or writing reference books, or sometimes just a book I'm reading), and a chocolate offering to the muse (he has a sweet tooth)
3. Wearing gray! (Absolutely essential...I'm not weird or anything...) And comfy pillows
4. Sleeping cat not required but usually present 

Just like I may or may not finish my novel, I may or may not write another blog post this year, so I think I'll say Happy Holidays and Happy New Year now!

What's in your writing space? How do you stay motivated? 

07 November 2018

End of the Year Push

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How is it November already???? I think I say pretty much the same thing every month. Time just seems to fly by and I never feel like I get as much done as I'd like. So, with less than two months left in the year, I want to see how much I can push myself to get done before making brand new goals (probably just the same ones over again...) in the new year. 

So the goals that I still care about are:

1. Finish the third draft of Uneven Lines. 

How have I not finished this???? I really hope every book I plan on writing doesn't take me as long as this one has. In my defense, it's SUPER complicated and it's been difficult to write, but I still refuse to give up somehow. The good news! I think the end of the book is going to be a lot shorter than I anticipated. As I try to conceptualize the ending and how it needs to be different from the first two drafts, I'm realizing that things need to move a lot faster. I think the end of the book used to drag but now I feel like things will happen very fast and hopefully be exciting. So...it could happen before the year is over? Maybe?

2. Read 100 books

Oh, this one. I make it every year and never come close. My monthly themes idea hasn't been as easy as I'd planned, but I could probably spend an entire post talking about that. Honestly, this goal is probably the one that I'm least likely to accomplish. I'm currently at 67 books (see my Goodreads challenge), which is 17 behind schedule. I think the only way to salvage this is to read a lot of shorter books. I've still got a lot of blogger buddy books on my Kindle and a lot of them are short. But I'm also trying to stick to my monthly themes, and I'm on Anne Rice right now, which (you guessed it), is going slower than I'd thought. But this is the closest I've ever come to my 100 goal so I guess either way I've read more books this year than any other year, even if I don't make it there.

3. Watch 100 new movies

This is another one I make every year but never seem to get. You'd think since I have HBO and Netflix and Amazon Prime AND I live above a freakin' movie theater (I'm not kidding), it would be easy. I think it's just a time thing. I get way too restless to just sit there for two hours (especially in a theater). I like to multitask. But! I think this goal is doable. I'm currently at 78 movies (see my IMDb list!). 

Do I think I can get all three goals done? Uhhh...probably not. I think if I really tried to get the reading goal done, I wouldn't have time to finish the writing goal. But if I come up short on the reading goal because I was too busy finishing my third draft, well, I wouldn't exactly be disappointed. But I would be very disappointed if I didn't get either of them. So I'll just keep trying and see what happens. 

Do you have any end of the year goals? Would you rather get writing or reading done?

03 October 2018

Derailed (Also, Back Up Your Work!)

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I should probably start with some good news! At the time of last month's IWSG post, I'd just finished my Chapter 16 edit. Since then, I've also finished 17, 18, and 19! Weird, right? I really felt like I was on a roll, like I couldn't be stopped....

but then...

Last Wednesday night, I went to turn on my computer. And nothing happened. It wouldn't turn on. Now, my laptop was probably at least 6 years old and the internal battery was useless, but it still worked fine with an adapter. It hadn't shown any signs of anything being wrong with it so I had no idea why it wasn't even turning on. My husband took it to some guys he knows at a computer repair place (that was closing in about a half hour) and they said they'd look at it. 

And so I was derailed. Like, I was a train riding smoothly along the track and suddenly I'm crashing down a cliff. Thursday was my day off and my plans of writing all day went right out the window. And before you say "well, just write by hand" I'll just say I DON'T THINK SO. I always write on the computer AND a huge chunk of dialogue I'd already written for Chapter 20 was on my flash drive. I hadn't printed it yet so I had no way of looking at it. 

I was also in slight panic mode. Most of the time I save my writing directly to my flash drive. Trust me, anything related to Uneven Lines, including all of the nonsense I've written for my two sequel ideas, is safe. I'm not a COMPLETE idiot. I back up my flash drive regularly on my computer, I print out finished chapters. I probably should back it up to some type of cloud thing (I'm super with technology as you can see) since now I'm even more paranoid. My blood, sweat, and tears have literally gone into this and I'll be damned if anything was going to make me lose it all (literally? ok, maybe just the tears). 

It was the other ideas. The shiny stories. Shiny New Story, to be specific. But also a fantasy novel idea that I'd only recently started actually writing instead of just playing scene ideas in my head.  I'd put a lot of work into Scrivener files for those ideas. And I'd never backed them up. They were only on my laptop, which was now in laptop limbo. 

Was it the end of the world? No. I hadn't exactly written pages and pages in these stories. But I'd written some good stuff. I'd done a lot of outlining, too, which I never do. I wasn't sure if I'd be able to rewrite those scenes and have them be as good just from my memory. So I was really kicking myself.

Did it all turn out ok? Mostly! The bad news was that my laptop was officially dead. I was advised not to put any money into it. The good news was that they could save everything from my hard drive. They sold me a used computer that was similar and transferred all of the files onto a folder there. It took me some time to reclaim my Scrivener purchase (because I was definitely not paying $40 for something I already had) and redownload it onto my new computer, but once I did, there they were! My shinies!!! Alive! And not lost! 

So the moral of the story is, BACK UP YOUR DAMN WORK! But I guess my bigger problem now is, I still feel derailed. I lost that drive I had when I was busting through chapter edits. And maybe part of the problem is that my latest chapter isn't actually an edit. It's a brand spankin' new chapter that I've never written before. But I think if the laptop fiasco had never happened, I wouldn't have fallen into this rut so easily. 

But I digress. Back up your work, people!

17 September 2018

Sometimes it's Easier

I can't remember the last time I wrote a non-IWSG post! (I don't write the Jordan Takes Over ones, he does...duh...). Oh wait, let me check...it was January! I just have not been all that motivated to write blog posts lately. I don't know what it is. Maybe because the writing has been slow going, or maybe I just can't come up with ideas. Or I'm just tired all the time. But I do really want to get back into it, so, this is a start!

I've been on vacation for over a week now and still don't go back to work until Wednesday. It has been AWESOME. I love a good staycation, where I just get to relax and read and write and watch TV and (sometimes) clean/organize my apartment like I've been wanting to for months. Somehow, though, I never get quite as much done as I planned. But it is still nice to not be at work!

As for the reading, I'm trying to catch up with my goal. I've only got one more Harry Potter book to reread, and I'm still reading A Dance with Dragons, and have been since May (I think)...why exactly do I always choose the largest books to read?????? I've been trying to read more blogger buddy books, which has been going a bit better...I've read 5 now and still have plenty more on my Kindle to read. My problem is making myself write reviews...I just really think I'm bad at it! I still have to pick some books to read for Banned Books Week, too...the struggle continues.

Anyway! What I really wanted to talk about is writing! Which has actually been happening! Ok, I won't deny the fact that I had hoped for some mega writing spree where I could finally finish the third draft of Uneven Lines over this vacation. But I didn't honestly think that would happen. But there has been actual progress!

I have to admit I did procrastinate for a few days before really diving into the writing/editing. But that's what you're supposed to do on a vacation, right? Have some fun? But at a certain point I knew it was time to crack down or this would just be another wasted vacation, and I couldn't have that. I've had way too many of those.

First I had to get through Chapter 17, which I'd been avoiding for a while. Not even sure why. There was a lot of rewriting to do and I really had to dive into a character's backstory. It had always been a bit vague in the first two drafts so I added a lot more to have it make sense. It took a few days, but finally the chapter was done! I had reached the promised land!

Why? Well, because Chapter 18 is probably my favorite chapter. The whole chapter is pretty intense and there's a twist at the end. Plus, as I said in this Instagram post, this is the chapter where I take Jordan's already tiny heart, rip it out, and stomp on it repeatedly. WHY IS TORTURING CHARACTERS SO FUN? I don't know, but this chapter has some of my favorite lines in the whole book, so maybe sometimes the writing is better when the characters are miserable. Who knows?

Long story short (this post has turned out way longer than I intended...), a chapter usually takes me weeks, even months to rewrite. But I got Chapter 18 done in less than 24 hours. And that was with sleeping and eating and watching TV. It probably only took me 5 or 6 hours overall. I'd say a good 2/3 of it was completely rewritten, and I added 3 pages.

I don't even know how that happened but I would like that magic to stick around for the rest of the book. Will it, though? Probably not. But maybe things will be just a little easier from here on out.


05 September 2018

My Unsellable Book

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Here we are at another IWSG day! I feel like I've lost my writing mojo. It went from not having the time or energy to write, to just not wanting to write at all. I did finish my Chapter 16 edit earlier in the month, though! So that's good. I also have a long staycation after this week (starting Friday at exactly 2:30, thank you very much) and I really hope I can get lots of writing done. We'll see.

Don't even get me started on my reading goal! I still have two Harry Potter books to read and I'm only on my FOURTH blogger buddy book (and I started with the shortest ones!!!!). Now I'm into September which was supposed to be Banned Books. I haven't even picked what books to read. But hey, Banned Books Week isn't until the 23rd, so....plenty of time, right???

Anyhoo, I decided this month to utilize the IWSG's optional question, which is:

What publishing path are you considering/did you take, and why?

This is a tricky question, but basically I'm considering any and all publishing paths, especially for Uneven Lines. In an ideal world, I'd like to be traditionally published, but I'm not so sure if it's in the cards for this particular book. Why? Well.......because it's probably unsellable. 

Man, I've really dug myself into a hole with this one. I mean, I knew before I started that it was a controversial topic. I wanted to write about a relationship between a teenager and an adult. I can only blame myself for this. But once all the details started filling themselves in, I fell in love with the thing. And it's been a struggle, but I've worked so hard on it, making it complicated, trying to make every line meaningful and mutli-layered and I really think if someone would give it half a chance they would actually enjoy it. 

A big part of the problem is finding a way to describe the book in a query letter or even a blurb that will get someone to actually be interested and not immediately turned off. I haven't quite figured that out yet. Well, mostly because I'm still working on the book. It's one of those I'll cross that bridge when I get to it kind of things. I did write a query letter for it once (for that pitching thing that must not be named) and I vaguely remember (because I've blocked it out of my memory) one of the mentors saying that the relationship came off as predatory. IN THE QUERY LETTER! I was like, huh? Clearly I did a terrible job on this letter if you have zero clue about the personalities of my characters and are jumping to conclusions. So in order to sell this book my query letter is probably going to have to be just as complicated as the book itself. 

But I digress...there's also that whole I don't know if its YA or NA or Adult thing. But...yeah. Basically, if I ever actually finish this book to the point where I think it's ready to be published, I'm going to try to get an agent and a publisher. But I am mentally preparing myself for it not to happen. I don't have too much of an idea of where to start for self-publishing, but that's just another bridge, I suppose. 

First I gotta finish the book, amiright?????

06 August 2018

Jordan Takes Over: Symbolism Schmymbolism

**The first Monday of the month, I let my muse take over the blog. I apologize in advance.**

Did everyone miss me? Has there been a shortage of tissues? Wait, don't answer that.

I just want it on the record that I was dragged out of a very nice nap in order to write this blog post. But we've got this new thing going that I don't have to write a post *every* month, but if the first Monday of the month is after the first Wednesday, Sarah says I have to. Something about how her IWSG posts will always steal my thunder and I won't get any attention and I do not like that one little bit. So, here we are! I get this week, bitches!

Anyway, what to talk about? If you did read Sarah's post last week, she mentioned how Chapter 16 has a lot of potential symbolism that hasn't really been properly explored. To which I would say, these are things that actually happened in my life and it's not my fault if you read so much into it.

Ok, ok. OK!!!! So everything in a novel is supposed to serve a purpose, right? So I guess these things need to be figured out so that they're not just stupidly thrown around wherever. BECAUSE if a character lets me use a red blanket in this chapter, and then buys me a red scarf in the next one, you're supposed to stop and think about that, right? What does it mean????? 

Well, the blanket and the scarf are protective symbols, like, this person is trying to protect me (pfft like I need it), from a) himself and b) the cold mean world, yada yada. But **RED** is important here. Red is representative of sin/desire/passion. But the blanket/scarf is more about love/protection. Because the fact that this character has two sides is something that comes up CONSTANTLY, i.e. the structured/caring side vs the chaotic/desire driven side. He's not one side or the other; he's both--which is represented by these objects. ALSO. What else is red? Blood. Which makes you think back to an earlier chapter where I tried to help make dinner but ended up cutting my finger with a huge freaking knife. And this is the idea that he can try to protect me, but bad things will still happen.

I just bored you to tears, didn't I? Because you probably have no idea what I'm talking about. But even if you had read the book, would you be able to pick up on all of this just by reading about a damn blanket? Plus symbolism is always up to interpretation, right? Someone may read the totally wrong thing from it. Or they may not pick up on it at all.

But anyway, that whole paragraph of nonsense just leads me to realize that we DID figure out some of this symbolism a long time ago so why am I even here?

Because I guess there's MORE. *sigh* We have to figure out why there's a moment while making chocolate chip cookies where it has to be explained why salt is used in baking. And apparently that has to mean something. I don't know. I'm tired. I think I'll sleep on it.

JP

01 August 2018

Falling Behind

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Another IWSG day and I still feel like I'm in a rut. I feel like a broken record sometimes with these blog posts. I really want to start blogging more, too, but it's hard to come up with ideas. I do have a lot of vacation time coming up so maybe I can spend some of that planning some posts. And I may or may not force a certain someone to write a post for next Monday. 

Anyway! Some good news! I FINALLY finished my Chapter 15 edit! That I more or less have been working on since February. And by more or less I mean I spent most of that time avoiding it. But it's done! And it was the last really in depth make out scene in the book so I'm really glad because I seriously ran out of ways to describe kissing. 

Now I'm onto Chapter 16...which, as usual, is going slower than I'd hoped. But this time it's more of a time/energy/enough coffee deal than me avoiding it. There is a lot of potential symbolism in this chapter that I'm just NOW realizing I really didn't explore enough. On the third draft. I make so much sense. 

I'm also waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay behind on my reading goals. July was my Harry Potter reread month, and I'm still on Prisoner of Azkaban. Yeah. In my defense, I started very late...because I was behind on my June books...because I was behind on my May books. You get it. August is supposed to be my blogger buddies' books month! Because I have so many on my Kindle! That means if you're reading this and you have a book published, there's a good chance your book is on my list! But I don't know if I should finish Harry Potter first, put HP aside to start the blogger buddies, or try to read both simultaneously. 

I am seriously doubting if I'll actually make it to 100 books this year. But I'm not giving up. I've still read a lot more books than I have in any previous year. 

And that's about it. Next week is my birthday (!) and I am a) not working after Monday, b) going to see Moulin Rouge (the musical!), and c) having lots of time to myself because hubby is going to Boston Comic Con for three days. So hopefully that will be lots of reading and writing time. I also get to cheat on my diet. 

Are you behind on any goals?

03 July 2018

Ramblin' Time

**It's the first Wednesday TUESDAY! (silly holidays) of the month, which means it's the posting day for the Insecure Writer's Support Group! Click here to learn more and sign up!**


It's one of those days where I don't know what to write about (every day??). I'm not sure if I have no ideas or too many ideas. So I apologize if this post ends up being filled with rambling. 

The IWSG Twitter Pitch is coming up aaaaaaaaaaaaaand...there's no way I'll be participating, even though I really wanted to. For multiple reasons, but the main one being, MY BOOK ISN'T DONE. Probably not a good idea to pitch a book that's not done, right? Just ask...oh, yeah, me when I tried PitchWars *shudders*. Never again. Oh, and I'm still stuck on Chapter 15 for those of you keeping score at home. I'm lucky if I can get one sentence written a day.

My other big reason for not doing the Twitter pitch is that I'm still not quite sure on what age range to pitch my book to. It's complicated. I've gone back and forth between thinking it was YA and then thinking it should be Adult, and then changing my mind again and again and again. So the book is front the point of view of a fifteen-year-old, and it does have some coming of age elements, but I'm not entirely sure this is a book should be marketed to minors. I'm also not so sure if adults would even want to read it, though. Basically, I've written an unsellable book. I don't think, "I swear it's good!" is a great selling point.

But maybe when I actually finish the thing I'll let some people read it and get their input. 

And now for something completely different...

This month's optional question is: What are your ultimate writing goals, and how have they changed over time (if at all)?

I guess my goal has always been to publish a book, so that has never changed. But I think the goals change depending on the WIP. For UL, obviously the first step would be to publish it. Then comes the movie deal, of course. Ok, not really (but maybe). Then I would want to figure out if my sequel ideas are actually worth pursuing. Aaaaaaaaand that's pretty much it. Then there's other story ideas, of course (shiny!). 

All right, I'm done rambling. For now.

06 June 2018

Blog Post Scrambling & Title Struggling

It's the first Wednesday of the month, which means it's the posting day for the Insecure Writer's Support Group! Click here to learn more and sign up!

So, a funny thing happened to me at work today. There I was, walking around, minding my own business, when it suddenly hit me that a) it was already Wednesday, and b) I FORGOT TO WRITE MY BLOG POST!!!! I've come close to forgetting before, but I've never actually forgotten. So now that I am home from work I am scrambling to write it, and hopefully I'll still have some time and energy to get around to some other blogs. (If not, tomorrow's my day off so I'll be playing catch up!) 

Anyhoo, since I'm scrambling, this is a perfect opportunity to utilize the IWSG's optional question of month! Which is: What's harder for you to come up with, book titles or character names? 

This is an easy one for me. BOOK TITLES. *cough* Definitely book titles. Book titles are a serious struggle for me. They can take years. Character names, on the other hand--piece of cake! Most of the time it's like I'm not even naming them at all. It's more like their names just pop into my head, like the characters are telling me the names they already have. 

Example time! When I first started writing Uneven Lines, once I figured out an idea of who the characters were, their names pretty much popped into my head instantaneously (clearly Jordan is the type of pushy character who would name himself). 

The title on the other hand, took a loooooooooooooooooong time. When it was originally a short story, it was called "Saying Yes," which did work considering some of the elements in that story. But when I started adapting, I changed a lot and that title just didn't work anymore. So it went to titleless. About two years later I came up another title, The Formula. It kinda sorta worked and I did like it but it just didn't feel good enough. It was boring. 

About eight months after that I finally settled on my current title, but not without some struggling. The words actually came to me individually. I'd always felt "Uneven" should be in the title, because that's representative of a lot of aspects of my characters' relationships. Then eventually I realized "Lines" was also a good fit, because there's actual math in the book, as well as a hell of a lot of figurative lines (like, lines being crossed in particular). And so I finally had it! And it's been over four years without a change. 

So, long story short, I struggle way more with book titles than character names. Shiny New Story is still called Shiny New Story. Pretty much all of my other book ideas are titleless, including the potential sequels for UL. But character names? Usually all I have to do is listen. 

07 May 2018

Jordan Takes Over: It's a Trap!

**The first Monday of the month, I let my muse take over the blog. I apologize in advance.**

I know, I know--I haven't been here in forever. It's not that I didn't want to. Well, ok, maybe I didn't want to. But, I mean, do you really want to listen to me ramble unless I have something really good to say? Real life conversations? Easy. Blog topics? Not so much.

Anyway, why did I decide to show up today? I was tricked, thank you very much. Ok, it went like this:

Sarah: Are you writing a blog post for Monday?
Me: Pass.
Well, fine. You know what? You can't write a blog post. 
Excuse me?
I'm not letting you. 
GIVE ME THAT LAPTOP.

Dammit, reverse psychology really works on me. I mean, you tell me I can't have/do something (or someone...), whooooooooaaaaaaa watch out. So now that I'm here, what do I write about?

Hold on a second, someone left a plate of cookies here! That's...suspiciously thoughtful. Well, ok, I guess Sarah knew the whole time that the reverse psychology was gonna work and I'd be here, so maybe the cookies are a peace offering. And I don't say know to dessert. I'll just have one...or ten.

Where was I? Oh, right, blogging. The thing I'm supposed to be doing right now. Listen, it's not my fault when you just drop cookies in front of me. Sugar. My only weakness.

So apparently Sarah has a staycation next week. Which apparently also means that I'm supposed to be on full time muse duty next week. FAT CHANCE. No one asked me about my schedule. I'm extremely busy. I've got...you know...gigs. Snacks. Naps. Very important stuff. Did anyone clear this with Adam? You know, he's way more organized than me. Where is he, anyway?

OOooooooooooo there's cupcakes, too! What's going on here? Some kind of dessert buffet? I mean, really, I'm not disappointed, but if Sarah had just told me there'd be dessert, then she wouldn't have had to do the whole reverse psychology thing. Well, I guess I could have grabbed the food and ran away. Ok, maybe she knows me too well.

So, right. Staycation. *sigh* A whole damn week and she expects constant writing? Yeah, when has that ever happened? Ok, when we first started writing this story, but that was like, seven years ago. When has it happened since then? Huh? NEVER. That's right. So why exactly does she think it's gonna happen now??

Wait a second. MORE DESSERT? Oh look! Pie! Ha. Ok, this is a little weird. It's like...there's too much dessert. Something's kinda off here. What kind of pie is that, anyway? Wait...is that...KEY LIME?

OH F---------

*a giant net falls* 

What the....AGGGGGGGGGGH. I knew it! The dessert buffet was a trap! This whole thing was a trap! But wait a second...who would....YOU! This is not right. You are not this crafty.
Yeah, but I've had you living in my head for seven years. It rubs off. 
That's what---
DON'T EVEN. 
Wait a second, did you do something to Adam?
He's indisposed at the moment. That way he can't distract me with Book 3 ideas and he can't distract you with his hair. 
Yeah, but, where is he?
Tied to a chair somewhere. It's ok. Muses don't need to eat.
I beg to differ.
Come on, we're gonna finish this damn novel. 
The whole thing? But there's so much work to do!
Which is exactly why you're not going anywhere! *starts dragging net*

I just want it on the record that I was tricked and KIDNAPPED and any words produced and/or edited were done against my will. Is there a muse's union? I'm calling my rep.

JP

02 May 2018

Try Something Shiny

It's the first Wednesday of the month, which means it's the posting day for the Insecure Writer's Support Group! Click here to learn more and sign up!


So here we are at another IWSG day...and I feel like I'm in the exact same place I've been in for the past two months. I just don't have much of a desire to work on my novel. I desperately want it to be done, but I don't want to work on it. Solid logic, right?

Anyway, I decided to change my strategy (you know, doing absolutely nothing), at least for a little while. Take the pressure off a little. So I let my mind drift to a different story. Shiny New Story, to be specific (which will get an actual title at some point). And then eventually my fingers drifted as well. As in actual writing. Real life words! Not just random ideas I punch into my phone at 3 AM. Like, paragraphs! Dialogue! Stuff happening!

I think there were a lot of factors that made it easier to work on SNS. Just because it was something different. Because it's a first draft and I can write really crappy sentences and not care. Or even care if everything is making complete sense, because I can fix it later. And the main parts I worked on were particularly suspenseful, which was a fun change. Not all of my story ideas always involve suspense, but I do really enjoy it, so it was fun to work on.

I'm not entirely certain this completely reinvigorated my desire to write. I was hoping after indulging for a while, I would eventually get back into editing UL. That still hasn't happened. But it was nice taking a little break and to actually get some writing done instead of just avoiding everything.

At least I know when I'm struggling to write/edit, I always have something shiny to distract me.

04 April 2018

Same Old, Same Old

It's the first Wednesday of the month, which means it's the posting day for the Insecure Writer's Support Group! Click here to learn more and sign up!


So here we are again at IWSG day aaaaaaaaaaaaand....I feel like I am in the exact same spot I was in last month. I haven't written a blog post in a month. I'm still working on Chapter 15. I have no idea why it's taking so long (I'll get into that later). According to Goodreads, I am 12 books behind my goal of 100 for the year. Last month I only read half of the books I planned on (my books made into movies category), so I plan on continuing with those books while also reading poetry books for this month. Also because I think if I'm not reading a novel I may go insane. 

Anyhoo, back to the Chapter 15 woes. This is once again a chapter I thought would only take me a day or two to edit, and now it's been over a month since I started working on it. However, in this case, it's more like I just can't motivate myself to work on it, rather than it being more difficult than I expected. It's not that difficult. I mean, editing anything has its challenges, but this isn't a chapter that needed a lot of huge changes.

There are only two scenes in this chapter. There's a lot of dialogue, and brief make out scene (don't judge me). There's some backstory for both characters, and a secret is revealed that I've been keeping for the whole book. Sometimes I worry about that secret, that by the time it's finally revealed, the reader won't actually care (since it's about a subplot, so it wasn't something that was constantly brought up).

Is any of this the reason why I can't finish this chapter? Uhhhhh....not really. Except maybe I think I've used up every way I can possibly describe a kiss.

I honestly don't know why I can't finish it. I think I'm just tired when I come home from work and I don't really want to do anything. That's a big part of it, at least. I think I need a new routine that works in writing and reading time (and hopefully some gym time, too).

So hopefully by my next IWSG post (and hopefully it's not my next blog post), I'll have at least finished this chapter. More would be nice. But I'll settle for one.

07 March 2018

Securely Insecure (or Insecurely Secure?)

It's the first Wednesday of the month, which means it's the posting day for the Insecure Writer's Support Group! Click here to learn more and sign up!


It happened again! I went a whole month without a blog post! Bad! I haven't even been reading other people's blogs. Double bad! I don't even really have a good excuse besides laziness (or maybe just being tired).

At the very least, I thought I'd write a post just to brag about how I managed to see all nine Best Picture nominees before the Oscars this past Sunday. Well, I guess I'm bragging about it now! It helps that I live above a movie theater and my husband's friend is in SAG and lent us some screeners (shhhhh just don't tell anyone). I really liked all nine, which is unexpected. But they were all good and deserved the nomination in my opinion. Just don't ask me to rank them! You can probably guess my heavily biased I've read the book like three or four times favorite...if you pay attention to my usual nonsense 'round here.

Anyway, I'm rambling again. On to the insecurity!

Actually, you know what? I'm not really feeling that insecure lately (besides the not blogging thing). Well, I'm not fully secure either. At last month's post time, I was still stuck on Chapter 13 of my third draft. It was definitely grueling, but I got through it! In the last draft, this chapter was 3 1/2 pages. Now it's 8 1/3! I think it came out so much better than before.

And guess what happened after that? I FINISHED CHAPTER 14, TOO!

Ok, so this isn't happening at the speed of light, but it's much faster than my usual pace. So now I'm on Chapter 15, which I haven't looked at in a couple days but once I actually sit down and do it, shouldn't take too long (yeah, yeah, we've heard that before, Sarah). I'm actually surprised at how much I've had to change as I'm writing this draft. It's a lot of new stuff.

What I am a bit insecure about is that the closer I get to the last third of the book, the more work will be needed. I basically have to completely rewrite that last third, minus a couple scenes (maybe just one, actually). I thought editing the first two thirds would be easy, and I was so, so wrong. I already know that last third will be difficult, so it'll probably turn out to be impossible. Or maybe it'll be the opposite and be surprisingly easy. I can dream, right?

Does editing ever turn out to be harder (or easier) than you expected? Did you see any of the Best Picture nominees?

07 February 2018

Fizzling Out

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Somehow it's February already. And despite all the motivation I had at the beginning the year, I don't really feel like I've accomplished much. It seems all that motivation fizzled out rather quickly, and I'm trying to find ways to get back on track.

So how did January go? Well, so so, I guess. I started off strong with social media, taking part in challenges on both Twitter and Instagram. About halfway through the month, I pretty much gave up on the Instagram ones. I knew I would skip days here and there if I didn't have things to post for those particular days, but at a certain point I just stopped doing it. I think it was equal parts not having good ideas for the posts and just not having the motivation to do it.

I did, however, stick with #WIPjoy on Twitter right until the end, so that was great! I've always wanted to do it and it was a lot of fun. I probably won't do it again with the same WIP, but definitely with a different one.

Reading has also been so so. I'm a little behind on keeping up with my yearly goal of 100 books. I only read 4 books in January, and only two of those books were from my "Clear the Bookshelf" theme. So, the bookshelf is still pretty full. I did finish another book today and am close to finishing my 6th, but I haven't started my February romance books yet. However! I'm at 5 books which is waaaaaaaaay ahead of any previous year's reading. I probably haven't finished 1 book in the past few Januarys, so I'll count that as a win (sort of).

Writing? Hahahahaaha. Yeah, bit of an epic fail there. I haven't gotten anything done. I still haven't finished my Chapter 13 edit. It's just turned out to be so much more complicated than I thought it would be. Which will be great once it's done. It'll be a really interesting and complex chapter, where I thought it was super simple to begin with. But...I have to actually finish it first.

The good news? I have the next four days off from work (I have waaaaay too many PTO hours and we can max out so I have to use them!) so that means lots of time for writing and reading!! Let's just hope I actually do it.

15 January 2018

The Amazingly Difficult Chapter

Have you ever had a chapter surprise you? I've been avoiding my Chapter 13 edit for quite some time, not really knowing why. I thought it had to do with setting, one of the aspects of this book I have the most trouble with. Whenever my characters actually leave the safety of their own homes and venture out into the world, I always wonder if I'm getting it right. If mentioning locations and landmarks feels real or forced. If it would seem accurate to someone who actually lives there.

But what if that wasn't the real reason I was avoiding it? What if I didn't actually know the reason, but when I figured it out, was actually blown away? Even though it was even more difficult than I anticipated, it turned out to be a good thing.

The more I work on this story, the more I find hiding under the surface. On the surface, this chapter seems pretty basic--my characters are going on their first real "date," which ends up being at a museum. Underneath, however, are about a million different layers that I didn't even know or intend to be there. But I knew that this chapter needed even more work than I thought it did. So maybe on some subconscious level, this was why I was avoiding it.

I always knew there was a lot of symbolism in this chapter, but it seems to be even more complicated than I initially thought. This is the first real time my two characters journey out into the real world together, so there's a lot going on both internally and externally. I had to think about how they would act differently when surrounded by dozens, even hundreds of other people, when they are so used to just being by themselves. Every setting change offered different opportunities to examine that--waiting for the subway, on the train, on the street, in the museum lobby, in the Greek and Roman section, then with the European paintings, back to the street, and then back at one character's apartment at the end, to where they are once again safe. While they are awkward and silent on the subway, on the street the mood changes and they are able to talk, actually examining their past relationships with their mothers and places they've both gone with them, then by the end of the museum trip, one character has a moment of vulnerability and lets something slip that he probably shouldn't have. It's a journey that takes so many different turns that I wasn't expecting.

What I realized was that this chapter wasn't difficult--it was amazing! Well, ok, still difficult, because there is a lot to put in there. I really just thought there were only a few things to examine, but there was so much more. I found myself weaving in subplot, hinting at back story that will come into play in the next few chapters, finding ways for my characters to figure each other out.

There was so much to add in that wasn't there in the first two drafts, so I'm still working on it, of course. But I think this chapter is heading in the right direction now.

10 January 2018

Productive! (but not actually writing...)

So one of my resolutions was to get back to blogging once a week, and well, I didn't blog on Monday like I usually would do. But hey, it's still the second week so it doesn't really matter which day I blog, now does it?

Anyway, I feel somewhat productive so far. I have been reading more than usual, just not as fast as I'd like. I picked my first book off the shelf for my Clear the Bookshelf! themed month (The Coldest Girl in Coldtown by Holly Black), and I'm also reading The Weekend Novelist for the IWSG book club. I kinda hoped I'd be done with both by now and onto a few new books. Plus I promised myself I could reread Call Me By Your Name once I did (been dying to since I saw the movie a few weeks ago), but it hasn't happened. Plus there's that sexuality in Ancient Greece book I still need to look through. And I can't exactly clear the bookshelf by only reading one book that was waiting on the shelf. I'm not a crazy person or anything.

Social media! This is where I've been doing my best. I've been taking part in two (and a half-ish) challenges on Twitter and Instagram. #WIPjoy on Twitter which I've always wanted to do, but I've been very nervous about. It can be scary to share stuff about your WIP, especially when my book idea is controversial. But like I said on day one of the challenge, this is the year where I say screw it! It's fun to share different aspects about my book and to see people actually respond to it.

One of the most fun things was creating an aesthetic for Uneven Lines, which I've never done (and I've been working on it for almost 7 years!). I made it for Day 6 for WIPjoy and I'm using it again today on Instagram for #Storymakers18. It was really tricky to decide on images (plus finding free ones that I thought fit my story) but it was so much fun and I luuuuuuuuuurve it.


Now, here's the problem: I HAVEN'T DONE ANY WRITING. Oh sure, I'm spending lots of time thinking about my book, finding pictures for it, searching it for lines to share. But I haven't written a single word. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? I could have edited three chapters by now! It's probably because I'm too busy doing all the other stuff. 

I think there's an upside to this. At least I'm thinking about the book all the time. I actually fell asleep last night thinking about the next scene I have to edit. So I hope if I keep it up this will lead to actual writing/editing. If I just sit my butt down with my laptop and actually start doing it. We'll see...

03 January 2018

2018 Goals & Chrys Fey's Flaming Crimes Blogfest

It's the first Wednesday of the month, which means it's the posting day for the Insecure Writer's Support Group! Click here to learn more and sign up!


Ok, so I don't really like making resolutions, but I just can't help myself. I suppose I would like making them if I actually accomplished them. But they tend to fizzle out. But like every year, I've made a list again of what I'd like to get done this year!

1. Write, dammit! So the real goal is to finally finish the third draft of Uneven Lines. But first, I just have to actually write. And keep writing. This book ain't gonna write itself, otherwise it'd be long done by now.

2. Read, dammit! I once again have made it a goal to read 100 books this year. I really just want to do it once and then I will never try it again, I swear. Hopefully my monthly themes will help me get this done.

3. Be more active on social media. I feel like I haven't been doing a lot lately, and that includes blogging. I want to blog once a week and post more often on Twitter and Instagram. I'm already doing some challenges this month to help me out with this.

4. Watch 100 movies I've never seen before. I can't believe I didn't get this done in 2017! But I did get closer than ever before with 87 movies. I was purging my Netflix list at the end of the year because a lot of the movies were leaving but I still didn't make it to 100. I know I can actually do this one if I just try!

And now for something completely different...


What is something ridiculous you would save if there was a fire?

Well, my cat is ridiculous, but it certainly wouldn't be ridiculous to save him! XD

Ok, so I approached this question this way: after my husband and cat are ok, and I have my wedding rings, important papers, & my flash drive (all my writings!)...what would I grab next? What's not quite so important but I still wouldn't want to leave behind?

My Playbill binder!


This has the playbill for every musical and play I've ever been to. From My Fair Lady (first live musical ever!)...


...to Hamilton!

And I probably won't be adding to it for a while because I do not have theater money right now. Is this something I couldn't live without? No. But it's not something I'd really want to lose, either! I love musicals too much!


Series: Disaster Crimes #4
Page Count: 304 
Digital Price: 4.99 
Print Price: 16.99
Rating: Spicy (PG13) 

BUY LINKS:

BLURB: Beth and Donovan are now happily married, and what Beth wants more than anything is a baby. Her dream of starting a family is put on hold as fires burn dangerously close and Donovan becomes a victim of sabotage.

Donovan escapes what could've been a deadly wreck. Their past enemies have been eliminated, so who is cutting brake lines and leaving bloody messages? He vows to find out, for the sake of the woman he loves and the life they're trying to build.

Amidst a criminal mind game, a fire ignites next to their home. They battle the flames and fight to keep their house safe from the blaze pressing in on all sides, but neither of them expects to confront a psychotic adversary in the middle of the inferno.

Their lives may just go up in flames…

About the Author: Chrys Fey is the author of the Disaster Crimes Series, a unique concept blending romance, crimes, and disasters. She’s partnered with the Insecure Writer’s Support Group and runs their Goodreads book club. She’s also an editor for Dancing Lemur Press.

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