07 July 2021

Anything but a Quitter

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This month's optional question is: What would make you quit writing? 

I think the short answer is...NOTHING. And I'm being completely serious. I mean, I've experienced pretty much everything that involves not writing--breaks, breathers, pauses, hiatuses, burnout, crushing depression, feeling like my writing is never going to be any good and no one will ever read it. But the one thing that I never did was quit. I just don't think it's in me. 

I've always been a writer. Ever since I was little, I imagined stories in my head. I don't think I could make that go away if I tried. Even if I had no intention to publish, I would still write for myself. I would still come up with stories and want to put them into words. 

I guess the only plausible scenario would be if I ran out of ideas, and that definitely isn't happening any time soon. I've still got plenty of ideas that I haven't even started yet. 

I have been feeling rather insecure when it comes to writing lately. I mentioned a while back that I had a three month goal of working on something writing related every day (and that I would reward myself with Cheesecake Factory when I finished). I was doing great for a while. Some days were more productive than others, sure, but I was doing it. 

Well, when June hit, at first I was feeling a bit burnt out. I was struggling to pick things to do every day, and for several days in a row I just watched Youtube videos about writing. I felt kind of guilty even counting that, but I was able to write down a few notes and get inspired from those videos. Not too long after, though, I got sick. I don't even know what I had. First I thought I had strep throat, but I tested negative. Then a couple weeks later I had a horrible headache for days and even a fever for a bit. I pretty much refused to go to urgent care because they couldn't do anything for my throat and I didn't want to go back, and I really just felt like I needed to rest. 

I did get better after a couple days, but I didn't do any writing whatsoever. Part of me was upset, but another part felt like I needed the break. I needed a few days to not have that pressure hanging over my head. 

But I did want to get back on track, so I decided to let July be my third month! It's going well so far. I've started slowly with a search for "that," which can be really easy to eliminate a lot of the time. My first sweep got 1255 'thats' down to 1062. I honestly thought it would be more, but I'm going to go back through it again and get rid of some of the trickier ones, or the times where there are way too many in the same paragraph or page. And then I'll move on to the next task.

Do you ever feel like you need a break? What would make you quit writing?