23 December 2013

A Somewhat Jaded Christmas

Has it been a week already? I suppose I should get back to blogging...I know I never actually said I was taking time off. It just kind of happened. I don't have to be so rigid anymore, but I'd still at least like to try to stick to my schedule.

Ok, if I'm going to be honest, I'm feeling a bit jaded. Maybe I do just need a break from blogging. Maybe I need to work on editing for a while, let my second draft be my main focus. Maybe I feel a bit like my 100th post was a complete failure. Maybe I really need a vacation. Or to just sleep for 24 hours straight.

Maybe there's just a tiny rock stuck under my backspace key that is driving me insane!!!

Did I tell you guys I rewrote the first chapter? I don't remember and I'm too lazy to go look at older blog posts. But yeah! So that's good. I completely changed the first paragraph. My original first line now opens the second paragraph instead. It was one of those things where you think you're going to struggle with the decision but then just immediately realize that it needs to change and you'll get over it.

Honestly, though, the first chapter was the easiest to edit. Nothing about the overall structure really changed. Now I'm staring at the second chapter and wondering if I should break it down into two or three separate new chapters. Or should I just write scene by scene and worry about labeling the chapters later?

Part of me doesn't even want to think about trying to write until January. Partially because resolutions and fresh starts and whatnot, but also because that's when work slows down for a bit and maybe I can relax a little.

And yeah, I kinda don't care about Christmas this year. I mean, I'm really excited about the gifts I got for other people. I had fun with it. I ran a Secret Santa at work, which we've never done before. But anytime someone asked me what I wanted, I had no idea. Because I really don't want anything. At least nothing that other people can give me. There are only things I can do for myself. Things that take time. Things that have already taken too much time.

Blah. Ok. I feel most of my blog posts come off as more depressing than I mean them to. But anyway, I'll be back tomorrow for Mark Koopmans' 50 States of Pray event. Although I still don't know what I'm going to write...but you should check it out!


  1. Glad to hear you've made some headway on edits! Unfortunately I'm not one to inspire you at present because my own engine has been stalling lately. I'm thinking about getting away from the beaten path and using my blog for short fiction for a while. We all know I need more practice with that.

    I feel the same way about Christmas. Receiving gifts is not quite as charming when you have enough money to buy yourself anything anytime. Anyway, Merry Christmas!

    1. I really just want things like, a book deal! Not more books or DVDs that I have no room for. Merry Christmas!